In life I’ve learned a few things:
1) friends are great but not “needing” them puts greater value and appreciation for the ones you truly hold dear.
2) Moments are fleeting and to be IN the moment as it happens is something worth celebrating, not always by ruining it by taking a photo. Just let it happen.
3) no matter how sexy you may think you are, if you’re dumb, you won’t hold my interest for long.
4) some people are only good for one thing. It may not be a noble sentiment but it’s an honest one.
5) your greatest potential isn’t always what others may think, but pay attention because sometimes it is.
6) secrets are only as safe as the vessels that house them. Coffins are the most if not only secure vessel so choose your confidants wisely.
7) At some point, every single person you know, even your closest most trusted ally, will disappoint you and let you down. Guard your heart against this, but don’t close it, if you can keep it open after the affront.
8) know yourself. Before looking to be someone’s someone, know who the hell YOU are and what YOU need and what YOU are willing to contribute.
In life I’ve learned a few things:
I’ve always been a fan of Lana Del Rey, from the first time I happened across her song Video Games while listening to the UK top 100 (don’t ask). I needed to know who this vintage siren was who understood my nostalgia towards life gone by while remaining fully present, in the present.
When I got Born To Die and I listened to it from start to finish I said “This is the most amazing sh*t I have listened to in ages!” Then came Paradise, or Born to Die – Paradise Edition. Again, amazing tracks. I was full and in love with the poetry, vocal stylings, controversy and audacity of an actual songwriter cooing about her life, love, her dreams and of course her flavored vagina! I wasn’t expecting her to release anything for a while and I resigned myself to that. Then West Coast came out all of a sudden and I bought it as soon as I saw it on iTunes.
West Coast touched me in a way none of her other tracks did before. The dual styled song within a song speaks to the sentiment of what the West Coast (California) represents to Americans but for me, it spoke to the West Coast of my little island and how I feel whenever I’m there – hopeful, ambitious, gifted, revered and almost worshipped. Life DOES get better, on the West Coast.
Ultraviolence as a title tickled me. I first saw it on her Instagram while trolling through my feed, I said “yaaaaaassssss bitch! Give it to me!” Upon regaining my composure I said I must get the album when it came out.
Hearing Ultraviolence was like hearing my unwritten journal entries being sung out loud by a voice that wasn’t mine. Here were my innermost thoughts and secrets being aired and reverberating through my bed from my subwoofer. I can relate to the album a little too much, more than even my closest friends will realize.
The toxic relationships, the unwavering love in the face of apathy, emotional retardation, indifference and general melancholy reminded me of my dedicated love, like St. Jude, the patron saint of lost causes, that still lives on to this day. A love that haunts, overwhelms and envelops.
F*cked My Way Up to the Top has replaced Cola in my mind’s default Tourette’s like song outburst. The gall of her! She is definitely controversial but it doesn’t feel deliberate. It’s simply honest and unapologetic (Hey Rihanna) and she makes real music about real life and real experiences. Some literal, some metaphorical, some lived and some witnessed.
The me of today feels about Lana Del Rey’s music like how the me of the 90s felt about Alanis Morissette. Having grown darker and more honest with myself and my pathology, Lana Del Rey is my new drug of choice.
And to the one person who won’t read this – Old Money is the song I dedicate to you, even if you change your mind I’ll come, come come.
Yup. Time to start back exercising. My body fat percentage is probably at 90 right now. That’s right folks – I’m being held together by lipids.
That having been said, I consider myself a sexy bag of lipids, but still – something must be done. Please bare in mind that I’m not making this decision for anyone other than me. My self-esteem is pretty solid, I might even venture to say high, so it’s not because I am crying myself to sleep while I have one hand In a large bag of Doritos while the other is flicking through Men’s Health and wishing I looked like the guy on the cover (and every ad – at least in the “after” photo as I currently resemble many “before” shots.)
I’m doing this simply because I recognize that I have been lazy. “Thick” is all well and fine but it ain’t thick if it jiggles lol. I could stand to tighten and tone especially since I adore food and cooking. Plus I’m not getting any younger and I rather put in the work now than have to put in way more work and down 100 pills for my10 physical problems like diabetes, hypertension, erectile dysfunction etc.
Now – where are my sneakers… The running ones not the leather ones that have never seen anything quicker then a rush for an evening sale.
Wish me luck! Tell me about your plans and routines, maybe I’ll adopt some of them in my quest to Adonis status!
Since I’m writing about it again it must mean the cake was a success!
The cross between a rich chocolate cake and a velvety smooth cheesecake turned out better than I had planned, but as good as I had hoped. The reason for my skepticism lay not in a lack of faith in my baking abilities, no no, it stemmed from me never having perfected either a chocolate cake before and not even having attempted a cheesecake before!
That’s why in my earlier post I spoke to this ambitious endeavor without going into detail. I decided to throw caution and recipes to the wind and say “you know what, I know what good cake tastes like, let me make this batter to suit.” And that’s what I did.
I also decided that it made no sense skimping on the ingredients and wind up with what would have been marvelous cake had I only used better quality ingredients.
Cadbury Cocoa, Kerrygold butter, Wisconsin cream cheese (yes, there is other cream cheese in the world besides Philadelphia cream cheese), fresh eggs, full cream milk – all went into the cake. As for the frosting, I donned a French accent and used French butter and two types of frosting sugar to create a triumphant cream cheese frosting that melts in your mouth.
I baked a small one for a friend as a late birthday/dangerous anniversary gift (inside joke) and I cut the rest of it into big slices to share. The thing’s going fast though… I may only end up getting one slice for myself!
This year I promised (myself at first, then the world) that I will be doing one cake a month.
The reason for this stems from last year’s late in the game decision to perfect my cake baking skills. Clearly I lack a life. Meanwhile I was baking cakes so frequently and with no set structure – time, occasion etc., it became way too costly and time consuming. Enter the cake of the month.
Some months will have cakes that pay homage to some event that takes place in that month while others will be cakes I just like/feel for that month. January’s cake though – this one is an idea that I must see come to light.
Sin – the Cake. This may be one of the most expensive cakes I will ever make but if you’re going to sin you might as well go all out. The name “Sin – the Cake” (not just sin) is due to the share decadence of the cake. A fusion of cake ideas in one cake. There will be a cheesecake like component, a rich chocolate component and of course a white chocolate component.
I must admit it is an ambitious enterprise especially to start off the year but why wait until December after I’ve allegedly mastered the art of cakes? Pfft! To hell with caution. I’m going to make Sin – the Cake and it will either be a triumph or a complete waste of my money.
If you hear nothing more about this, suffice it to say it was a failure.
Talk to you later!